Jessica Kelso

Dear Nola girl,

You are 5 months old! Next thing I know you’re going to be off to college. I’m sad you are growing up but so happy at the same time. I’m not sure that’ll ever make sense to you until you have your own babies!

So glad I am your mama, little beebs.

You have become a rolling champion and you desperately want to sit up without help. When you are flat on your back, you are either rolling to your stomach or lifting your head and feet to try and sit up. What’s the rush, baby? I miss you all curled up asleep on my chest. When did you get so big?

We had planned to stop swaddling you sometime this past month, but that hasn’t happened just yet. We tried doing it “cold turkey” one night, and you were not a happy baby. I think it was a sign that you just aren’t ready and I’m okay with that. You are getting far too long for the velcro swaddle that we have so we just started keeping your legs out and that seems to have solved the problem!

Breastfeeding is still difficult. I’m seeing a whole lot of doctors to see what’s going on so hopefully I’ll find out something soon. You love to nurse though and you are such a perfectly sized baby. You are getting just the right amount and that makes me so incredibly happy. We’ve made it 5 months, Nola P. I’m not giving up on you, I promise. You still won’t take a bottle – although we rarely try anymore. I know it’s way different than mama. . . so I don’t blame you. You are a girl who knows what she wants. I can admire that.

This last month you’ve been waking up at least twice at night. It came as a little bit of a surprise since you had been sleeping 6-8 hour stretches since you were just a couple weeks old. You usually go to bed around 8 or 9 and wake up sometime between 1-2am, again at 4 or 5am, and you are usually up for the day between 7-8. I really wish I could get you down for the night earlier but with your brother running around being loud, it’s pretty impossible. You’ve been consistently taking a really good long afternoon nap which has been lovely for mama. It usually gives me some much needed quiet time or I get to cuddle up with you and take a nap. It’s always my favorite part of the day.

You wake up in the morning and from your naps in the best mood. You never wake up crying unless you just aren’t done sleeping. You will lay there and blow bubbles, make little cooing noises, and wait for mama to peek over the bassinet at you. I love waking up to your smile. It’s hard to feel grumpy despite a lack of sleep when I see that smile!

I’m pretty sure you are teething because you want to chew on everything you can reach and you can soak your shirt in 10 minutes flat. You never act grumpy because of it though. I really have no idea when that first little tooth will come in but I’m enjoying your sweet toothless grin for as long as possible!

You weigh right around 15lbs and are starting to fit into 6-9 month clothes. Your grandma just bought you a bunch of spring/summer time outfits in 6-9 months and I can’t wait to see you in them! Mama is having SO much fun dressing you. I’m not sure how I will handle the day when you want to dress yourself! This is you in the dress and shoes your Aunt Mary made for you. I was so excited it finally fit and you looked absolutely precious, as usual.

You are becoming more and more of a little lady with such a fun personality. I can’t wait to see what the next month brings.

We love you more than you’ll ever know.

- Mama

While T is being looked after, I have a couple of minutes to spare. I am constantly coming up with things to write in my blog but never seem to find the time to actually sit down at the computer for longer than 5 minutes.

Life has been busy.

If I’ve ever said that before, I was lying. I didn’t know what busy meant until I had two babies under two and a husband who travels. I’m still getting sick all of the time. I just finished my fourth round of antibiotics in four months. Third time having a breast infection. Kevin was home for the weekend and I was so excited, until I woke up Saturday morning with a fever. I stayed in bed feeling sorry for myself while he had fun with the kids. On Monday I drove 2.5 hours to see a family physician who is also an International Board Certified Lactation Consultant (IBCLC) and she spent 1.5 hours with me. I wish she was closer, she is the exact doctor I’ve wanted all of us to see. She is trying to help me figure out why I’m still having so much pain when I nurse and why I keep getting mastitis and other things. I’m also seeing an allergist next week who I’m hoping can help with some of the immune system issues I’m having.

I’M 25!!!! What is going on? I feel like my body is seriously failing me.

Breastfeeding Nola is extremely important to me. I had someone imply that I need to think about my own health instead of caring so much about making sure she gets breast milk. I also had someone say “just stop nursing”. . . like it’s that simple. Obviously there is something going on with my health that needs to be figured out, and if I “just stopped nursing” her now who knows if I’d ever find out what it is. We’ve made it almost 5 months, and I’m so proud of that. She’s my girl and she’s worth every bit of it.

I’ve just started thinking about Thrasher’s birthday party in May. I seriously can’t get over the fact that he’s about to turn 2! Nola is almost the age he was when he came to us. Ahhhh!

TOO. FAST.

He is my loud, energetic, strong-willed little guy. One second I feel like I’m about to lose my mind while he is throwing a fit on the floor and the next he’s quietly singing “Jesus Loves Me” while my heart is on the floor. There’s never a dull moment with that one. Things are hopefully about to get started with the adoption process. . . and I couldn’t be anymore excited to make him a Kelso on paper!

This morning I had to drag Nola out with me in the rain so I could have blood work done. I got her out of the car. . . carrying the diaper bag, car seat, and an umbrella trying to shield her from the rain was nothing less than amusing to anyone watching. When inside I went to give them my insurance card and realized it wasn’t in my wallet. I remembered using it the day before at another appointment but they must have forgotten to give it back to me. So we had to turn right back around and do the whole process a couple more times, all while Nola is screaming her lungs out in her car seat between trips. She hates her car seat. I really hope it’s just a phase…because I don’t do well hearing my baby cry. Once we finally got inside and settled into the waiting room, she was flashing all kinds of smiles and had the attention of every single person in there.

It was one of those mornings where you justify stopping for a cup of coffee and a donut on the way home. It seems to make everything better.