Jessica Kelso

There is something about this nice fall weather that makes me want to stay in the kitchen all day and bake lots of goodies. I’ve stayed away because we’ve been trying to eat healthy and cut out snacks as much as possible, but it hasn’t been easy. That is going to be the hardest thing for me this holiday season. . . but I’m sure my waistline might thank me for it later. Or I’ll just end up eating everyone else’s goodies!

Today we met with our re-licensing counselor who will be coming to our home at least once a month. She seemed super sweet and very helpful which was a huge relief. Along with her, we will be having quite a few other people in and out of our house on a monthly basis and it’s kind of got me freaked out. I know why they need to be in and out and I’m really  happy to know that these foster children are being looked after by many different people, BUT if you know me well. . .  you know I’m a little over the top about having a clean and organized house.  Since I haven’t been working it’s gotten even worse. Keeping this house clean has pretty much been my job and I take great pride in that. I get the biggest smile on my face when a new person comes over and compliments how clean and nice our house is. That means I have done my job well. When I have a delicious dinner made, the house is clean, laundry baskets are empty, clothes are ironed, and Kevin comes home and tells me how amazing a wife I am and how much he appreciates all that I do, I once again know I’ve done my job. I mean, there are lots of days when only some or possibly none of those things get done and people may come over unexpectedly and I wish I could crawl into a hole and pretend this isn’t really my house. . .but Kevin is usually able to calm my nerves by saying the house still looks great. If there’s dishes in the sink, I mean even a cup (yes, I know real people use cups) it will make me uneasy. I’ve had people come over and compliment me and then say “Ohhh you just wait until you have kids!”, and I’ve always thought to myself. . . “You just wait, it will still be clean!”. So the thought of taking care of a baby along with constantly having to keep up with my OCD cleanliness scares the living daylights outta me. Maybe once I feel like I have an excuse for a slightly unorganized home ( don’t most mom’s have one?! ) then I will feel more relaxed about letting people in without everything in it’s place. I will never have a completely messy home though, I just don’t have it in me. Everyone has their thing, and I guess that one is mine.