Jessica Kelso

Today after my morning coffee and elliptical session, I headed to the lake for an afternoon of reading my newest book, The Shack. Whether it’s by the television, internet, or phone. . . I always tend to get easily distracted when I read at home. It was beautiful outside, so I got up and went to the lake to get away from all distractions. It was a couple hours of bliss until the rain finally took over.

Not having a job to occupy me, or any extra money to go shopping with, I’ve had to find other ways to spend my time. This was a pretty good way.

On Monday, I was able to see my brother who was home for the day from Orlando. After that me and my mom took my nephews to the new park in Lakeland. It’s in walking distance from my house, which is so great! The kids had a blast while we had panic attacks. With the park just recently opening, it’s still REALLY crowded and Aidan is a fast little runner. We lost him a couple of times, but lucky for us he had on a bright green shirt that was easy to spot.

So many ups with a couple of downs. I’m taking them both as they come. One at a time. Or sometimes they like to come one-thousand-five-hundred at a time.

Lots of deep breaths.

We decided it was time for a day of fun and remembered we still had our passes to Islands of Adventure and hadn’t been in a long while. So Kevin took the day off work and we braved the cold. I’m glad we did. . . because it was the most perfect day.

It was my first time ever being at a theme park without over heating. Everyone should try it at least once. Really. It’s a totally different experience. We ate churros, rode our most favorite rides plus a couple not so favorites, and enjoyed a beautiful sky on the way home.

Little trips like these make the bad moments a little more bearable. At least for me it does, I don’t know if I can speak for Kevin. I just loved the simplicity of the day.

This morning I watched our nephew, Caleb. What a sweet little guy he is! Not a sound came out of him except his cute little laugh. I’m thankful for my time off so I’m able to see my nephews more. Hopefully one day soon Caleb have a cousin close by to play with.

I’m just sayin’. . .

A year and a half ago we bought our home from a couple who lived in New Jersey. They had plans to move down to Florida and live next door to their parents, but eventually decided against it. So in the process of buying our house, painting it, and all that other fun stuff. . . we had plenty of opportunities to get to know our new neighbors, Bob and Marlene. They let us have painters come in and start painting a day before we even closed on the house. They mowed our grass for us before we had a lawn mower. They became like parents from the start. They have fed our fish and picked up our mail while we were away on vacation. They bought us our toaster oven, and taught us how to use our gas fireplace. In the mornings on my way to work they were always on a walk, and I would wave hello. It started the day off right for me to see them on their walk and always so happy. Happy to just be together. Bob has a work shed in the backyard that he lived in. I mean, working in there was his passion. He loved that shed. The beginning of December he went to the doctor to get a spot checked to find out it was cancer. Skin cancer. It had already spread through his entire body. Lungs, liver, spleen, everything. They said it could be weeks. He decided to do chemotherapy to prolong his time here and we decided to pray. His shed quickly became abandoned and their walks have come to a screeching hault. Bob is slowly dying inside his house while his wife clings to hope. I see the pain and fear in her eyes when we talk. It’s so hard to watch.

Cancer sucks. I mean, it really just sucks. In the past few weeks, I’ve realized something about myself. I’ve realized I have a 5-year-old’s mentality of death. I know death could be coming to someone I know and I pray for them, I pray for peace and for God to heal them. . . but I’ve never had to come to the realization of death actually happening. I’ve only had to attend two funerals in my life, one of which I had only met the guy twice and I was probably 12 years old. I’ve never lost anybody really close to me, so I’m very unfamiliar with death.

Kevin’s Aunt Gloria passed away a couple of days ago from cancer. I’m so glad we were able to spend some time with her while we were in Nashville. She was a beautiful person, and I’m so thankful for the opportunity of knowing her. She was a lively spirit and will definitely be missed by many.

“He will wipe away every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” Revelation 21:4

I am so glad she is no longer in pain. No more tears, no more sadness. Thank God for that! He is my peace and my comfort.

I think I should get an award for the world’s worst blogger.

A good friend asked me yesterday, “aren’t you getting sick of just being at home and not working?”. I told her that in the beginning I hated it, but lately I’ve grown quite fond of it. I explained to her a typical day for me.

I wake up whenever I want, usually being around the time Kevin leaves for work. I casually stroll out of bed with no alarm going off to wake my brain up before it’s ready. I open all of the curtains and blinds around the house. I don’t like being in a house that is dark. It’ll make me go from happy to depressed in about 5 seconds. On days that are above 60 degrees but below 80, I’ll usually open a couple of windows. I head to the kitchen where I make a cup of decaf coffee in my new french press that I absolutely love. Pour a bowl of cereal and head to the office to eat breakfast and check my mail. I usually contemplate writing in my blog, but as you can tell. . . it just never happens. After breakfast, I decide where to work out. My options usually include going to the gym, getting on my elliptical machine and watching a recorded episode of Dr Phil or something else equally as stupid, or going to the lake for a run. Most days I opt for the elliptical machine. Especially days like today when it’s in the 50′s. After that I shower and make some lunch with Kevin at home or meet a friend. Then my afternoons are filled with grocery shopping, picking up my nephew from preschool and hanging out with him, looking for jobs online, sending out my resume, spending time with my parents or other friends that don’t work, reading a good book. . . whatever I can to fill the day. With lots of help from my incredibly crafty sister (in-law) Mary, I plan on attempting a craft project within the next week or so. That may or may not be a new hobby included into my daily schedule. We’ll see how well I do!

I don’t really get how anyone could not enjoy that. . . but maybe it’s just me. Nowhere in my day do I have a boss asking me if I’ve finished something (that probably hasn’t even been started). Nowhere in my day do I have to feel stressed out because I didn’t have time to work out, make a healthy dinner, or call that person back.

I mean, I’ve had my days where I feel totally bummed that I’m not able to contribute to our family. Those are the days that I’ve prayed. . . alot. And God has this way of bringing me out of that feeling and helping me see that “it’s okay”. I don’t need to feel down. I am going to enjoy this time, because it won’t be like this forever. He’s got it all worked out and most of the time I end my day knowing that it’ll all be okay. He’s quite the comforter, that’s for sure.

Now, I have to get going. . . Dr Phil and my elliptical machine are waiting on me.

I loved my old theme, but I thought it was time for a fresh update. This one fits me better I think. A good hour of my life was spent looking at different themes yesterday trying to find the right one. That’s what you do when you’re unemployed. . . I mean, a housewife. You have time to look at blog themes, go to a bookstore just to read gossip magazines, spend hours in Bed Bath and Beyond just to buy potpourri refills, make up menus and grocery lists for the upcoming week, and cook extravagant meals. (I’m not saying I actually DO all of these things). Last week as I was filling out paper work at the doctor’s office, Kevin quickly corrected me when I wrote “unemployed” under occupation. He said, “you should say housewife.” So a housewife is what I’ve become. Being a housewife has made me want to clean, it’s made me want to get out of my pj’s before noon, have dinner cooking by 5, go shopping, all those lovely things that housewives do. Don’t get me wrong, I’m also looking for a job in the meantime but I’m finding most businesses are in no way looking to hire right now. I don’t blame them, I guess. So for now, I will stick with my job as a housewife. I could really get used to it.

Milo has been keeping me company during the days so I don’t feel too lonely. He’s been a great little companion. He won’t let me out of his sight for a second. If I’m in the office, he’s asleep at my feet. If I’m in the bathroom, he’s right outside the door. And as usual, if I’m in the kitchen. . . he’s right there waiting for me to give him just a tiny taste of whatever it is I’m making. It usually results in a huge let down, but every once in a while he gets to lick the tuna can. He’s actually really smart when he wants to be. . . despite what Kevin has said before. He sleeps in a cage at night because we are selfish and like to have the bed to ourselves, and if he isn’t locked up he always finds a way to get up and snuggle right in between us. So we have trained him with treats to get into his cage all by himself. I think he’s a lot like me in that he really loves having a routine. He knows when bedtime is and will start to get anxious if we stay up later than usual. I hope we will be able to train our kids to go to bed as easily as he does.

It’s really pretty cute!

And yes, I do talk to him like a baby. He is my baby for now.

We’ve been back from Tennessee for 3 days now. It was a lot of driving, but completely worth it to be able to spend time with Kevin’s family. We ate way too much food, played a couple of games, ate way too many desserts, and just enjoyed some time off together. I was a complete bummer most of the trip due to having a lot of pain in my shoulders. I just kept thinking it would get better, it would go away. . . but it didn’t. It only got worse. On New Year’s Eve I decided I had enough of the pain and went to a walk in clinic to see a doctor. Being our last day having health insurance, I figured it was a good idea to do so. He said there was inflammation in my shoulders and prescribed an anti-inflammation medicine. So far so good! There is still pain, but nothing like it was and I’m finally able to sleep through the night.

Yesterday we had fun looking at things to spend our Christmas money on. It’s been a toss up between a over the range microwave or a new patio set. The microwave that got voted “best buy” in Consumer Reports is the one we like the most but they have yet to make it in black. . . and I just can’t have all black and white appliances with a stainless steel microwave. And I don’t see us getting all new appliances anytime soon. We will have to just wait on that. I’ve wanted a nice patio set ever since we moved into our house, so I’m pretty sure that’s what we’ll end up getting. I can’t wait for the day I can finally throw out that ugly white plastic furniture that is there now. We were also able to take down Christmas lights and decorations. A little late I suppose, but I’m just happy to have it all taken care of. It feels nice to have everything back in it’s place.

Today it’s football, blogging, and napping. I love our Sundays. Today also starts a better week, a better year, a better me. I’m both hopeful and excited! The only New Year’s resolution I’ve made is to learn to trust God more. I figure if I can do that, everything else will fall into place.